I enjoyed this from the point of agreeing with the idea of the role of praise, with a slight counter argument about too much praise and not enough constructive critique… a fine balance… and oddly I have written about it. :D
Yes! We never know the impact our praise might have on others. Before becoming a manager, I was once a software engineer dealing with impostor syndrome, and a manager I had always made a priority highlighting my strengths (without neglecting my areas to improve, of course). I still remember one time when he praised how I handled a PR, and from then on I started feeling much more comfortable with how I wrote code.
Also, he praised my leadership skills even if I was an individual contributor and guess what? That was the seed that grew into believing I could actually become a manager some day :)
So that's why now that I'm myself a manager, even if it could be sometimes awkward, I try to make a priority reminding others of their strengths or saying out loud those moments in which I think things like "wow, they handled this demo like a pro!".
I had a very similar experience but the other way around. When I ventured into management I experienced impostor syndrome quite badly, so when I was asked to pair program or complete the odd ticket here and there I really struggled. It wasn’t until a couple of my senior engineers thanked me for my work and called me a “decent engineer” that I felt validated.
It didn’t eradicate my impostor syndrome entirely, but it made me feel more validated and hence more confident over time. Often it’s the things that go unsaid which we really need to hear.
I enjoyed this from the point of agreeing with the idea of the role of praise, with a slight counter argument about too much praise and not enough constructive critique… a fine balance… and oddly I have written about it. :D
https://imonevoice.substack.com/p/a-life-without-criticism
Fun read! Keep going!
Thank you 🙏
Yes! We never know the impact our praise might have on others. Before becoming a manager, I was once a software engineer dealing with impostor syndrome, and a manager I had always made a priority highlighting my strengths (without neglecting my areas to improve, of course). I still remember one time when he praised how I handled a PR, and from then on I started feeling much more comfortable with how I wrote code.
Also, he praised my leadership skills even if I was an individual contributor and guess what? That was the seed that grew into believing I could actually become a manager some day :)
So that's why now that I'm myself a manager, even if it could be sometimes awkward, I try to make a priority reminding others of their strengths or saying out loud those moments in which I think things like "wow, they handled this demo like a pro!".
I love this, thanks for sharing!
I had a very similar experience but the other way around. When I ventured into management I experienced impostor syndrome quite badly, so when I was asked to pair program or complete the odd ticket here and there I really struggled. It wasn’t until a couple of my senior engineers thanked me for my work and called me a “decent engineer” that I felt validated.
It didn’t eradicate my impostor syndrome entirely, but it made me feel more validated and hence more confident over time. Often it’s the things that go unsaid which we really need to hear.